Confrontation

It is often difficult to confront someone regarding an offence. Do you think confrontation is necessary? Ignoring confrontation is often the cause of bad feelings. Those ugly feeling can reside in a person, churning away until he comes so upset that he can hardly think straight.

Personally, I believe it is better to say what or how you feel and get over with it than to allow those emotions to turn into an ugly monster, just waiting for the opportune moment to attack the victim. This happens when ugly emotions go unchecked. Confrontation, though uncomfortable, may be less painful than having to apologize later for erupting in a fit of flesh like a volcano that spews destructive lava all over its surroundings.

Really, it is about the issue of honesty. Are we honest about how we think and feel? Inside they seethe with anger towards someone about a perceived offence; yet on the outside, they smile and pretend as if everything is all right.

When you refuse to confront an offence, you are just as wrong as the one who violated your rights. Jesus said…”if they brother trespass against thee, rebuke him, if he repents, forgives him – (Luke 17:3). If you are going to be mature in your relationships, you must learn how to confront others when you feel they have wronged you. It may be difficult to do that, but it’s a lot less painful and leaves fewer scars than does a soul that is filled with bitterness and resentment.

Prayer does wonder

Prayers resolve a lot of problems by itself. Prayer will put you in a position where God can speak to your own heart. After praying, if you still sense that you are supposed to confront the other person, pray for that person first. The Spirit of God may give you a strategy regarding the situation, what to say, when and how to say it.

Confrontation with prayer will bring you to a new level where you can deal with the issue in the right spirit.

Don’t be judgmental

Do not treat the other person as an enemy. Your relationship may be going through some rough times, but you must view the two of you as being on the same side. The purpose of this confrontation is not to prove how wrong the other persons is; it is to learn how to work better together and keep the channel of communication open.

Better Parenting Tips

We have a choice: Either we teach our children good values or we abandon their future to chance. If we don’t teach our children, somebody else will.

Consider the influences on our children, television programmes, movies, questionable music, neighbourhood kids, internet, printed materials and the media. How about the peer pressures from classmates? Who’s really teaching them?

For most parents, the honest answer is that others have far more influence on their children than they do.

How can we gain and maintain proper influence over what our children learn? How can we help them learn proper values and standards? If not, how can we become the primary influence?

Are we the guiding force in shaping our children’ thoughts and moral standards? The pressures can be staggering. It’s no wonder so many parents feel overwhelmed when they consider their child-rearing responsibilities.

These may be some practical keys to bringing up successful children:

The Key of education.

The pattern of a child’s life is often established by age 3. After this age basic patterns of behaviour change only with considerable difficulty; the child’s personality is largely set.

At age 3, a child will learn a great deal through formal education. Reading to your children will broaden their world and sets the stage for them to satisfy their intellectual curiosity. You can help your children learn to love books.

Encourage them to read books that match their interest. Make time to take them to the library to browse among the books of their choice.

The Key of Personal Involvement

Being a parent is a complex responsibility. Many parents, busy with their jobs, careers and other work pressures, are quick to give money and other material things to their children. It’s too easy to overlook the fact that their children are craving for time to be with their children.

Children simply need their parents. They really want their parental involvement, beside love, attention, support and encouragement. Get involved with your children. You will reap rich dividends for yourself and them.

The Key of discipling in love

Parents should be sensitive in guiding their families. They should set sensible rules for their children according to their ages. Peace requires order and order requires certain rules. Parents must take time to explain why such rules exist.

Of course, parents must follow the same rules. They should be the role models for their children.

The Key of hugging, holding and reassuring

A parent should never feel embarrassed to show affection through hugging and holding his children. All children need affection and reassurance to know that their parents really love them. When they succeed at just about anything, encourage them, letting them know you are pleased about their success.

Parents, love your children and teach them while you can. Take advantage of the time you have as parents.

Managing Change

Managing change and dealing with its implications will differ from person to person. There are broadly three types of reaction to change:

Resistant

Why resistance? The reasons being most people refuse to accept new ideas and approaches. They are also reluctant to undergo re-training or unlearn what they have been so accustomed. For this group of people, change means much re-working and adjustment and they are unsure whether they could cope.

Indifferent

Change is viewed as something going on around them. The view of the indifferent person might be one of avoidance until some form of acceptance becomes absolutely necessary. The indifferent person often believes that his or her world will remain unchanged and that someone else will be affected or will do what is necessary. Apathy often accompanies this attitude to change with an "I can cope with it" mentality.

Receptive and open

These people are receptive to new ideas and prepared to embrace the reality of a situation recognising what needs to be improved or done differently. It is not necessarily about the wanton desire for change for its own sake. Change will happen so there is a lot to be said for being a part of the process at an organisational level and accepting this reality at a personal level.

Why do so many people respond so negatively to change?

Positive elements of change can include the creation of a better set of circumstances, the fun of being involved in something different, the opportunities presented from a new venture or means of employment. However in the short term change can also mean loss, discontinuity, and the destruction of a familiar and "safe" way of life.... "the good old days". Consequently feelings of insecurity, a lack of trust in the hierarchy and feelings of being sold down the river can lead people to savagely protect the status quo. A lack of understanding, a lack of trust and fear of the outcome are perhaps some of the key reasons that lead people to reject change.

Question: Consider the following elements of your own life

Work environment
Work relationships
Circle of friends
Personal relationships
Family
Where you live
The job you do
Your financial status
Your health

How many of the above elements have changed for you during the past five years? It is highly likely that many if not all of these major life elements will have changed to some degree. How many of these changes, good or bad, simply happened and how many of them did you actually influence and affect